How is a Christmas Birthday?

Transitive

Teacher tells a student
a=b, b=c implies a=c.
Tell me an example.
Student: I love you,
you love your daughter,
so I love your daughter.

Cool headed

News is I'm back from Tirupathi and had a good Darshan. Thanks to the volunteers - who man handled people in the queue to take a break when we were there. Also tonsured my head during the holy visit. Hence here is the aftermath of being without something after many years!

- After taking bath, I tried adjusting my hair and ended up scratching my scalp.

- Esp when few girls got down from the adjacent bus, the hand auto magically goes to adjust the hair. :-) Chinna viyasu palakam.

- Some of my testimonials said, I was a cool head. Now I know.

- One of my roomie has more hair than me as on date.

- Its a bit awkward to see my own shadow, the curves look sexy on the head.

- Never knew a potential of a "Tamil film villain" within me. What to do, once in a while movies like Shivaji also get screened.

- Even committed the sin of touching the comb.

ROFL: SBI Card

via

What do you say?

Piled higher & Deeper

Fwd: Philosphy of Marriage

When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.

After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can't face each other, but still they stay together.

By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher.

Woman inspire us to great things, and prevents us from achieving them.

The great question... which I have not been able to answer... is, "What does a woman want?

I had some words with my wife, and she had some paragraphs with me.

"Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays."

"There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage."

"I've had bad luck with both my wives. The first one left me, and the second one didn't."

Two secrets to keep your marriage brimming
1. Whenever you're wrong, admit it,
2. Whenever you're right, shut up.

The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once...

You know what I did before I married? Anything I wanted to.

My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.

A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong.

A man inserted an 'ad' in the classifieds: "Wife wanted". Next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: "You can have mine."

First Guy (proudly): "My wife's an angel!"
Second Guy: "You're lucky, mine's still alive."

Fwd: what chance do you have?

In the world of love & married life, one single rule applies to men:

Make the woman happy. Do something she likes, and you get points. Do something she dislikes and points are subtracted. You don't get any points for doing something she expects. Sorry, that's the way the game is played.

Here is a guide to the point system:

SIMPLE DUTIES

• You make the bed (+1)
• You make the bed, but forget the decorative pillow (0)
• You throw the bedspread over rumpled sheets (-1)
• You go out to buy her what she wants (+5)In the rain (+8)But return with Beer (-5)
• You check out a suspicious noise at night (0)
• You check out a suspicious noise, and it is nothing (0)
• You check out a suspicious noise and it is something (+5)
• You pummel it with iron rod (+10)
• It's her pet (-10)

SOCIAL ENGAGEMENTS

• You stay by her side the entire party (0)
• You stay by her side for a while, then leave to chat with a college buddy (-2)
• Named Rita (-4)
• Rita is a dancer (-6)
• Rita is single and is really beautiful (-80)

HER BIRTHDAY

• You forget her birthday (-50000)
• You take her out to dinner (0)
• You take her out to dinner and it's not a sports bar (+1)
• Okay, it's a sports bar (-2)
• And it's all-you-can-eat night (-3)
• It's a sports bar, it's all-you-can-eat night, and your face is painted the colours of your favourite team (-10)

A NIGHT OUT

• You take her to a movie (+2)
• You take her to a movie she likes (+4)
• You take her to a movie you hate (+6)
• You take her to a movie you like (-2)
• It's called 'DeathCop' (-3)
• You lied and said it was a foreign film about orphans(-15)

ENJOY THE 'BIG' QUESTION

• She asks, "Do I look fat?" (-5) [Yes, you LOSE points no matter WHAT]
• You hesitate in responding (-10)
• You reply, "Where?" (-35)
• Any other response (-20)

COMMUNICATION

• When she wants to talk about a problem , you listen, displaying what looks like a concerned __expression (0)
• You listen, for over 30 minutes (+50)
• You listen for more than 30 minutes without looking at the TV (+500)
• She realizes this is because you have fallen asleep (-10000)

Now what chance do you have???

Responsible Guys

Responsible Guy 0: Calls... Responsible Guy 1, On the other end.
Responsible Guy 1: What time is the train? Where are boarding it?
Responsible Guy 0: 10:15PM I remember, but not sure! I will be in Cant..
Responsible Guy 1: Do you have the ticket printout, I don have. (just 2 hours for train..)
Responsible Guy 0: yeah I have.

Responsible Guy 0: Do you know what to do after getting down at the station? Where is the lodging and what's the Wedding hall name?
[Silence Prevails...]
Responsible Guy 1: NO, I don know. Guess we should ask Responsible Guy 2. Since he is coming from Hyd.
[Both Responsible Guy 0 and Responsible Guy 1 decided to get the info..]

Responsible Guy 0: Calls... Responsible Guy 2. Hey whats the plan da..
Responsible Guy 2: I got all info from Responsible Guy 3 (the bride groom) will send you them as Text message.
Responsible Guy 0: Oh! Cool thanks.

Responsible Guy 1: (takes a different route) Calls... Responsible Guy 3, directly..
[too much noise, was barely was able to hear anything..]
Responsible Guy 1: Dei, Responsible Guy 3. Where are you da? Whats this sound. Are you traveling in a bus or in a cinema theater.
Responsible Guy 3: Dei, I'm in my wedding reception da. :)
Responsible Guy 1: Oh ok sorry da , entha #$%@#$ da appo phone ah edutha ,call you later

Responsible Guy 4: (its 4AM..) Calls Responsible Guy 0. Dei, I have reached this place. What should I do now, where should I go.. ?
Responsible Guy 0: Immediately says, I will send you a Text message (He got this from Responsible Guy 2) follow that. :)
Responsible Guy 4: Oh ok da.. Thanks..

Responsible Guy 0: Whats your plan after the wedding? When are you starting back?
Responsible Guy 5: Yeah, I got to start back by afternoon I guess.
Responsible Guy 0: Have you booked tickets?
Responsible Guy 5: No not yet.. Dei, Responsible Guy 4, whats the train no you have booked the ticket for the afternoon.
Responsible Guy 4: I don know da.. The ticket is in my bag.
Responsible Guy 5: I will find it out.

Out of all there is our leader "Responsible Guy" sitting at New Jersey and laughing at it. :)

Thanking You.
Yours Faithfully
Responsible Guy 0.

Be a Nerd...

Hi Malini

If you think I'm serious and this place is boring you. Just listen to this, I stumbled upon this one. Unfortunately the Author is unknown. But I owe him a beer/coffee!


Koundamani as Malini


Vadivelu as Malini

How to become a Manager?

I thought I will write the bottom up first. Disclamier: The views expressed here are not related to my Employeer or anyone associted with them in anyways. Everything written are just an imagination no where relates to real time. I would not gaurentee if it does so. 

Well, when you write such a post there has to be dicipline and process. So I guess my first post that I'm writing in a OO Writer.

1. First thing that strikes me hard when I think of this topic is that one should start using Windows to become a Manager, cut that Linux/Command Prompt and source code when he was a developer. 
   
2. One should not change the default wallpaper on the machine or laptop they own. Its like the default blue circuit kind IBM laptop wallpaper or the default windows landscape for Windows XP. :)
   
3. One should learn to open "notepad" application from Start->Programs->Accessories->Notepad. 
   
4. For (3) you should not use the keyboard. Only the mouse is allowed. 
   
5. You should start signing a mail from "--Myname" to "Thanks and Regards, MyName"
   
6. Inject lot of adverb, adjective, articles in one's mail.
   
7. One should stop wearing those torn jean and those one liner t-shirts that say "Do you mind, I don care". 
   
8. Start looking at options of brands like Raymonds, Peter England and Indigo Nation.
   
9. Start programming using sophiticated IDE like Word, Excel, PowerPoint.
   
10. One need to tell the same thing in 'n' different ways. "England lost the first test match to India", "India made a stunning win at the first test match against England".
    
11. Finally, stop working and start talking. :)
    

Hibernating again

All my bags are packed
Im ready to go
Im standin here outside your door
I hate to wake you up to say goodbye
But the dawn is breakin
Its early morn
The taxis waitin
Hes blowin his horn
Already Im so lonesome
I could die

Thats "leaving on a jet plane" by John Denver in Rhymes & Reasons. First thanks to Gopal to get me this play list in less than a day and sending it across. Its such a awesome collection of few of our favorite number. But yeah I would again go for an unplanned hibernation. :) My grace period is up. Its actual owners needed it back. Got to return the spare mobile and hold my peace for sometime. Now that I hate Motorola, what buggy code the engineer had accepted to ship. :( Next pit stop is Nokia for sure, but not sure when. But yeah, thanks Big Beautiful Fish. It was one roller coaster ride and I say "Thank You". Only regret is that wished I could backup, din have a choice. Flushing them! Still I have my old online phone list to help me out. Scheduling post for daylight...

A post by my readers :)

As a follow up for my post of getting my contact details. I had also put a box for any shouting my readers wanted to do. It was so nice reading them. Here they go.

• dumbo... enna da achu un mobile.. epadi tholacha?
• Still you have not changed the habit of losing mobile phones ? - (one of my Professors)
• My deepest condolences for the loss of your mobile!!! ;)
• nice way to rebuild your database.
• pls do call me. i think its been quite a while that we met.
• get lost :P
• Rombaa too much ethu ellam! Nyways stud boy proud of u
• nice idea.. hope this DB wud be there as your backup for ever!!!
• I understand how difficult it is to loose the mobile.take care .... :)
• Yeah actually something !!
• First for that lost mobile, I thought you sit next to Abhirami (may be no more in new building) and in IMHO she is the best security expert in Novell !!
• brother , no vaangana matum pathathu.. callum pananum.. sariya?
• pl join my lost mobiles community in orkut (this was best one, I laughed loud..)
  
• Overa sight adichukitu mathatha kotta vida koodathu
• honesty is the best policy(best lame line i cud think of)

Thank You All.